An HSP's Job Profile

Good day to you my dear brothers and sisters! Today I will be speaking a tad on how HSPs deal with stress in a work environment, careers of interest and why it is imperative to have a few HSPs working for you. 

I am certain that you are well aware of HSP traits by now. HSPs are not anti-social, shy or constantly under threat of been given the heebie-jeebies in a public setting. It is just not the same as those "weaknesses" I just mentioned. In fact, more than a quarter of HSPs have extroverted personalities! However, as in every sphere of life, HSPs are subjected to awful and unwarranted stereotypes and this puts off employers who are seeking for cultured and dedicated employees. These barriers should be hanged, drawn, quartered and eviscerated. I believe that we are living in an era where we can get rid of such trite and trivial stereotypes. 

How will you benefit by hiring an HSP? 

HSPs are devoted and loyal, both to your organisation and colleagues. 
HSPs perform very well with little to no supervision, in fact that is how they love to work, because too much of attention can break their spirits. 
HSPs never indulge in promoting themselves for higher perks or positions. 
HSPs tend to avoid office politics and gossip like the plague.
HSPs are stellar performers because they process details, goals and visions more deeply than many other character types.
HSPs get along well with other employees because they are able to sense the emotions and needs of others and all the other delicate nuances involved, thereby avoiding any unnecessary altercations or misunderstandings that may occur.

If you perceive one or more of your employees are HSP, I hope you find a way to work with them in a manner that will benefit your company and everybody else. As you may have experienced already, HSPs are usually quite intelligent and astute, you can obtain the best from them only when their temperament and character are fully understood and appreciated. Close supervision and unnecessary attention can easily unnerve and derail an HSP, to the point that he or she may become flustered and end up under-performing. I cannot stress this enough, that over scrutinizing an HSP can make him/her sweat, shake and become way less productive. Our society portrays an extremely twisted view with regard to HSPs and that is precisely where we should start implementing change. As an employer, you are driven by the urge to make profit and that is precisely what a business is. You may also run away with the thought that HSPs are more work than is necessary in our fast-paced and "instant" society, but just consider the pros and advantages of investing in an HSP. Once you study their characteristics and traits and treat them in a way that is befitting their personae, you end up with an employee/s who will stick with you and you company through storms and struggles! 

My dear HSP and Non-HSP brothers and sisters, as you are well aware, I am an HSP myself and I am of the introverted kind. Ever since I was a wee laddie, I have yearned to work with the mentally ill, I wanted to be a counselor or psychiatrist, but those plans didn't fall through. However, I have no given up and I shall pursue it, though I am currently involved in counseling others on an amateur level, not professionally of course, well not as yet anyway. I have always been of the opinion that no amount of academical degrees can trump the education you receive through personal experiences. Currently I am working as a travel consultant, the field I have been in for quite some time now. I must say that at times it does get stressful, since I am always on the front line, dealing with customers and they come of a wide spectrum of personalities. I may deal with an HSP customer and the very next instant, a boorish and demanding customer who might have had a bad day and had decided to take it out on me! Therefore, I have come up with a few suggestions for HSPs like myself to relieve some of the stresses we may encounter regularly at our jobs. 

1. The moment I start feeling overwhelmed, stressed out or burned out, I excuse myself to the restroom or the cafeteria, just to gather my thoughts, compose myself and take deep breaths. If there is a park or quiet spot nearby, it is even better. 

2. There are times where I feel like I'm doing to break down any moment, it can happen because at times we work in such fast-paced environments and in the midst of constant chatter and chaos. I have developed a breathing mechanism, wherein I close my eyes, lay back on my chair, clasp my palms together and rock to and fro for a while, it could be for even 10 to 20 seconds, but it does help. 

3. I am a bookworm, my idea of heaven consists of books in every nook and cranny set in a natural environment. Therefore, if you are inclined to read, do bring a book to work, read during your spare time, take some time out for yourself. If you like listening to music, do wear your earphone while at work, if your job permits you to do so.

4. We HSPs do not usually make the first move when it comes to friendships, we wait for the opportune moment and once we are hooked, we are friends for life! Try to find a colleague who you could confide in. Remember though to not go overboard, retain your personal details for a later time. 

5. As HSPs we find it difficult to say "No". In fact, I still find it to be a constant struggle to say "No" to a request. However, I have found that if I agree and acquiesce to everything, eventually I will be taken for granted which will lead me getting burnt out and then eventually lead to disaster. We do love to help others, but we also have our limitations and it is alright to say "No".

6. Some workplaces stipulate deadlines for certain projects. Deadline, the very word still does send chills up and down my spine. I have found it to be advisable that over-analyzing a deadline can only pull us further back. Therefore, I don't think of the deadline anymore, whereas I specify a date at a comfortably distant future as my deadline, that gives me a psychological edge to get things done. I further disintegrate large projects into wee, individual portions and work through them. 

7. Finally, if you still feel the need to vent and express your feelings, I would strongly suggest that you speak to your therapist, counsellor or a person who truly understands you. As HSPs, understanding and acceptance is essential. 

In summation to all the employers out there who may have HSPs working for you, do not fret. My advise is to do some reading on HSPs in the workplace, there are quite a few reading material online. If you think that an HSP is a liability, well, you are grossly misinformed and extremely mistaken. Being highly sensitive does in no way mean being highly inefficient or ineffective. Consider the following HSPs who have left their mark in our lives in a way we could never have imagined - 

Albert Einstein
Carl Jung
Abraham Lincoln
Martin Luther King, Jr.
Mahatma Gandhi
Mother Teresa
Sir Isaac Newton
Emily Dickinson
Robert Frost
Leonardo Da Vinci
Pablo Picasso 

The list goes on and on. As I have mentioned and as many studies suggest, HSPs are highly intuitive, intelligent and intellectual individuals. 

To ally my HSP brothers and sisters out there, do remember that we are in this world for a reason and that we are born HSP for a reason. We do have great ideas, but we are unable to go through with them because we think of "other" things, we let "other" external details mar and block our path and vision. The world stands to benefit from us and we are in a far higher position to bring about true love and goodness to this damaged world of ours. Aye, we must go forth with our great visions, that is what we were created for. You are special, you are valuable, you are worthy! I couldn't stress enough. 

Therefore, my dear HSP brothers and sisters, be proud of your heightened sensitivity, for that is the greatest gift of all. Go forth and spread your love to the world. You need it for your own healing and as well as for the healing of your society. 

To all my Non-HSP brothers and sisters, if you think you may have an HSP parent, sibling, employee, friend, do try to learn more about them and accept them for who they are just as much as you would want them to accept you for who you are. Trust me (I'm not saying this as an HSP), but the world stands to gain a lot than to lose by understanding the HSP trait!

God bless you all!

One Love. HSP Love.

Good day my darling brothers and sisters! Tonight (aye, it's nighttime in my neck of the woods), I'm endeavouring to talk a wee bit about something that our modern world is in desperate need of - Love! I shall start by saying something extremely corny, but true - Love makes the world go round. Aye, it really does! Love, either platonic or physical, is a feeling or emotion that comes naturally to us. It need not be coaxed, it need not to be developed, it need not be taught, it need not be cultivated. Therefore, my question is - Why then do we find a startlingly low amount of that all-encompassing emotion? 

As you all know by now, I'm an HSP. Love is an extremely important emotion to those of who share the HSP trait. However, I have found that many HSPs, myself included, are apprehensive with regard to showing love. Perhaps, it is because of unrequited love, fear of showing love and affection due to past or ongoing abuses, ashamed of being labelled as "overly needy" or "too sensitive", the list goes on and on. We HSPs are often burdened by worries such as whether we would be accepted and appreciated. As HSPs, we are capable of changing the world, yet we need a lot of encouragement, support and push. Therefore, it's the same when it comes to spreading our love, care and affection. 

It is surely an undisputed fact that HSPs are the preeminent leaders of the "Love Gene". We take our friendships seriously, we work hard to make our friends happy, we put their needs before our own, we are often the first to lend a shoulder to cry on, to lend a hand. We take our relationships seriously, we shower our partners with praises, gifts and small tokens of appreciation and we are often the first to give in, just so that we do not need to prolong an altercation or argument. We take our marriages seriously, we never stop loving our partners over time, we live and let live, we go to extraordinary amounts of length to keep our wee cove as intimate and cozy as possible. I hope you don't think I'm tooting my own horn here or being partial with regard to HSP traits with regard to love.

Well, it's not all black and white though. I speak with personal experiences and alluding to the testimonies of the countless HSPs that I know and have come across over the years, that being in love for a HSP can get rather tiresome and tedious. To get a better grasp of the actual meaning of the preceding statement, one must be aware of the complex intricacies of an HSP. In summation, an HSP's nervous system is far more attuned than the nervous system of any other character type, thereby we tend to be far more exposed to the elements, both unseen and seen in the environment around us. Therefore, we do tend to seek a lot of meaning and depth in our relationships, we expect a lot of attention and care (this is not being needy, in fact this is how you can get the best out of an HSP) and we do take anniversaries, birthdays and such special occasions extremely seriously; sentimentality is quite important for us. We do worry a lot, we are extremely concerned and we are always trying to figure out how to improve our relationships. HSPs stress out quite often than most character types and may require down time and they may find various hobbies and pastimes enjoyable in comparison to others. If you are a non-HSP, you may probably be in a relationship with an HSP. Fear not! An HSP is the most selfless, most loving, most caring, most devout and most loyal partner you could ever find! Do remember though that an HSP who is not understood and unappreciated is devastating to both the HSP and the partner. Therefore, many HSPs find that they can be far more happier with other HSPs. Birds of a feather do flock together. However, having said that, there is absolutely no reason for an HSP and a non-HSP to be happy together, as long as the vital signs are in check and taken care of. 

Moving on, I would like to stress a tad on the cultural aspect of being an HSP. Well, the stereotype is that women are born sensitive, but men are not and for a "real" man to be sensitive is extremely unappealing and distasteful. We do live in a world that is fast becoming, if not already, a place tailor-made for the alpha male. Women do love to have male HSP friends, but are unwilling to get married to one. This truly is a paradox of sorts, isn't it? Women often outline their "perfect man" and I find that they end up dating or marrying a man who consists of a few to none of the characteristics they have outlined in the first place. However, I have heard that there are many HSP communities around the world that are working tirelessly to educate the masses on the benefits of dating or marrying an HSP and for HSP men to feel more confident and to not hold themselves responsible for the situation they find themselves in. 

My dear brothers and sisters, I have been in quite a few relationships myself. Some of them were blissful, some not quite as much. However, I have learned a lot about myself and about the world as well. Every opportunity is a learning curve and being in a relationship is definitely one. To all the non-HSPs out there who are with HSP partners, all I can say is that you are blessed. To all the HSPs out there with Non-HSP partners, this is a time for you to learn more about yourself and to revel in the garden of that eternal emotion - Love. We have seen how opposites attract and it sure is an amazing feeling, the start is a truly exciting phase! There is so much to be explored, so much to learn, so much to be experienced, but of course in true human fashion, over time these feelings dissipate and the HSP partner may stress out more frequently and the Non-HSP partner may get frustrated with the constant pendulum of feelings exuded by his/her HSP partner. Therefore, it is imperative that partners understand each other. The same goes for HSP couples as well, initially it is an amazing feeling to be in love with a kindred soul, but as time goes by, boredom and familiarity creeps in and that initial spark is snuffed out in a jiffy. Anyway, this is the subject of another topic. 

In conclusion, my dear brothers and sisters, as an HSP, I can say without reservation that love is an important and necessary emotion. I have always spoken on the necessity of it, regardless of the situation, often to the sound of demeaning laughter and disparaging remarks, yet I will waver from my belief that we live in a world that is extremely wounded, there are many open gashes that need to healed. Therefore, we need to love, we need to be selfless and giving. Harvesting love in an overly cynical world is fast becoming a noble struggle. We can do it though, all we need to do is love, unconditionally and irrevocably. 

God bless you my darling brothers and sisters! 

The Seemingly Innocuous Tip of an Iceberg

My dearest brothers and sisters, I must admit that I did take a brief hiatus from writing since I was preoccupied with work. I do return home quite late and then it's a long shower, supper, some light reading and off to Bedfordshire (Bed, I confess I'm a die-hard Anglophile!), ha ha ha. 

We do live in an enlightened time, don't we? Yet, for all our technological and societal advancements, we continue to barrel down that woeful path strewn with landmines to our own demise. I believe that the primary source of our misery is the abhorrent refusal to accept the fact that we are mere mortals! I am reminded of a quote from Charles Dicken's amazing novel, "A Christmas Carol" - "When will men open their shut up hearts and treat each other like fellow travelers to the grave and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys" (I have subtly edited the quote), but you get where I'm going with it. We are all connected, in every sense of the word. It doesn't matter who or what you are, you can be black, white, yellow, red, Asian, African, European, Christian, Atheist, Muslim, it really does not matter in the grand scheme of things! We all come into this world without any possessions and that is how we will bid adieu as well. A human baby at birth is one of the weakest in the animal world, we truly are born helpless and for want of immediate supervision and victuals. We are often met with gruesome and horrendous news stories. Wars and other man made calamities continue to wreak a heart-wrenching toll on countless populations the world over. Movies often portray violence and we continue to let our children be exposed to such programs! We must also be aware of the fact that we live in an extremely fragile and sensitive world. We can see how global warming is causing havoc across the entire planet. Well, there is indeed a lot to write about our responsibilities as a citizen of Mother Earth, both to our immediate environment and the society we live in. 

My dear brothers and sisters, as you can see, we are in need. We continue to bury ourselves in false senses of security, entitlement and reality, however, the truth of the matter is that unless we change our attitudes, unless we are even willing to change at all, the future will continue to look bleaker. I have always spoken of the importance of Love. How do we harvest love in an overly cynical world? Well, there is no clear cut path nor is there a tried and tested method. If we were to look at some of the amazing personalities of our times, such as Mother Teresa and Nelson Mandela, what did they have in common? They had all the ingredients that make us human! It really is ironical, because were created to love, for love and be loved. Love comes naturally to a human being than its opposite emotion and feeling. So, how do we start loving? Firstly, start by loving yourself, treating yourself well, taking care of yourself. Accepting yourself is of paramount importance, because in order for you to love, you have to be a conductor of love. Thereafter, go out into the world. Start with your own family, bury the hatchet, apologize and forgive. It really is easier said than done, but nothing truly frees your spirit than accepting your mistakes and forgiving others for any wrongdoing you suffered from them. Subsequently, move on to your work place, your colleagues, peers, acquaintances and so forth. Finally reach out the poor and destitute. Perhaps sponsor the tuition fees of a child whose parents can't make ends meet, just a suggestion. There are many ways in which we can make this world a better place and it's always advisable to start off small. Love truly is contagious. Thereafter, we must persevere. We may be misunderstood, we may be labeled as fame seekers and our good deeds may be misconstrued in the most colourful of ways! Yet, we must not stumble and even if we do, we must stand up and continue on the same path, though are knees have been scabbed. 

There really is a lot to write on this subject my dear brothers and sisters, but I feel my bed beckoning me to lay on its soft, downy plumes :) I shall be writing more on this subject. I sure hope I don't get writer's block, because I intend to write a self-help book in the not so distant future :)

Have a great day and God bless you my dear brothers and sisters!

A Letter from the very Heart of a Highly Sensitive Soul

My darling brothers and sisters,

You may have noticed our friendship swaying violently like a wee boat on choppy seas, we have had to work hard to keep our friendship afloat, to keep moving forward. Many were the times when you, out of despair (though with good intentions) exclaimed, "You are too SENSITIVE! You are way too SOFT, way too INTENSE! You go way OVERBOARD and you're way too EMOTIONAL!". Aye, there were times when I went home and cried myself to sleep, after hearing these accusations which at the time I thought were personal abnormalities. I HATED myself for being what I was. I wanted to end it all, I wanted out, I wanted to be "Normal". There were times where I knew I was all of this even without you having to say it all out with such exasperation. However, I'm writing this letter in order to bring tidings of great joy! I have through trial and error, through research, through soul-searching and a lot of help from my religion, managed to acquire a great deal of knowledge about what it means to be HSP, what it means to be the last bastion of hope in a cynical world. I am thrilled to be able to share this new information with you, because I believe it will help us in understanding each other better and help our friendship flourish like a palm tree.

Well, let me start by stating the obvious - I'm a highly sensitive person. What does this mean? For starters, I have a nervous system that is genetically designed to be overly sensitive than most of the general public. Make no mistake though, human beings are sensitive species, but the HSP trait goes the extra mile, so to speak. According to many reliable sources, this trait is experienced by around 20% of the population, which is in fact a huge proportion of human beings. However, having said that, it's all about how intensely sensitive can a HSP get? Being HSP, I am affected by everything that is happening around me and I mean literally everything. It could even be as trite or trivial as a slight change in wind patterns! Being HSP opens a world of kaleidoscopic possibilities, in the sense that, I'm adversely affected by any sort of violence, from physical sports to action movies. Merely seeing another human being suffering from the pangs of physical or mental pain is enough to break me down. More often than not, I was my worst critic, I kept judging myself, I wanted to change, I wanted to stamp out my sensitivity. Most of you lovely souls who are not HSP can put a lid on your sensitivity, but the more I tried to do it, the more exhausted and weary I became. After a while I learned that rather than trying to get rid of my many gifts as a HSP, I should instead learn to harness these energies that are embodied within me for the greater good. 

I happen to live in a society wherein sensitivity is regarded as another synonym for weakness. I understand that and I have to respect that. I cannot afford to live in a bubble my whole life, shun the outside world and wallow in self-pity. In an ideal world, I would have been extremely happy if everybody used their sensitivity effectively so as to accept all character types, but the world does not work that way. I would have definitely have loved to live in a world where there was a general awareness of how the HSP psyche truly operates and not see it as a negative trait. In fact, we do have the resources, but merely lack the drive. Therefore, I am trying to use my sensitivity for the betterment of the society I'm living in, rather than feel sorry for myself. I'm trying to augment my inner strength and I'm attempting to break down all the data that my body is receiving into smaller packets, so that I can be more adept attaining a personal sense of fulfillment. As I've mentioned before, I'm in essence, open to all the elements and I take them all in, I can't help it, I have no choice in the matter. Thereby, I need time to settle down, I find it difficult to adapt to a situation instantaneously, I find it difficult to just go with the flow. I'm way too sensitive for that; yes, I admit that I do get frustrated with myself when that happens, but I just need time to operate well, and given sufficient time, I honestly do operate really well. Through experience and research, I learned that this is in fact an extremely beautiful trait of being a HSP, wherein it helps me to create a loving and caring environment for my friends and loved ones, if only I am accepted. 

My darlings, let me just take a few more moments of your valuable time to explain a bit more comprehensively on some of the matters that most non-HSPs need to know about having a HSP for a friend - 

We HSPs are highly emotional. We find this quite confusing too at times, because we may be picking up on your emotions and feelings and mistaking it for one of our own! I may withdraw into my shell and want to be left alone. Please do not misunderstand me when I do though, it is just that I'm overwhelmed and I just need some rest. Communication is a key element wherein I fail as a HSP. Do please feel free to inquire as to whether I'm feeling overwhelmed and I will answer in the affirmative, this will help both of us understand each other more deeply. There may also be times where I would want to talk about what I am going through, but do understand that I do not do well in pressure situations where I am forced to speak of my feelings. Generally, we HSPs love to be hugged and this is a sure-fire way to get a HSP to feel more comfortable and at home!

We HSPs are adversely affected by violence (be it real or fake), disturbing images, loud music and chaotic environments far more than non-HSPs. This is something that can not be changed or modified or lessened. If I happen to see or hear any of the above or related, I will take time to heal and I hope you will support me by being loving and considerate and giving me the space I require to compose myself.

We HSPs are easily overwhelmed and startled. As I explained earlier, we are open to the elements. I am affected by strong lights, loud music, objects moving in high frequencies, smells, sudden changes in the weather and so forth. You may find all this rather trivial and banal, but they affect me in a way that can never be comprehended by a non-HSP. Therefore, I shall let you know in case we need to change our surroundings and I would also appreciate if you would ask me if I'm comfortable, because frankly speaking, we HSPs do tend to give out invisible signs of discomfort, even without us being aware of it! Please do not startle me even in jest, because a HSP does not fare well in such situations. If I am startled, I may take a while to compose myself, it is just my body relaxing itself after the sudden intake of a rather unexpected amount of data. 

We HSPs do not fare well with criticisms. Please do not criticize me in public, nothing breaks me down more. By all means, do take me to a corner and speak to me gently with regard to your quandary, but do not yell at me or be harsh. I do value our friendship and by you being harsh, it will just break me into a million tiny pieces, of which I may take a very long time to recover. Please do understand that as a HSP, I am very loyal to you as my friend, I am extremely devoted to you and I love you so much. I do try to make our friendship work, but do remember that as a HSP, I have my own limitations, same as you.

We HSPs hardly ever recognize our own self worth. I grew up thinking I was a wee fish in a great big ocean of a world, that I have little to no value, that I am unimportant. To be frank, you have made me feel this way too and it sure did destroy me. However, I do hope you would remind me of the times wherein I made you feel special, wherein I was a source of support in a difficult situation. It sure does me a world of good to be assured that I'm valuable and loved. We HSPs sure do need to be pushed and encouraged to get the best results possible. We tend to lost interest or give up the chase, but with adequate support, you can help us be the best of who we truly are! 

We HSPs require a lot of time and absolute focus on achieving a certain goal or completing a task. We also require more rest than non-HSPs. Please do understand that I work very hard to sustain our friendship. Your support, understanding and love is all I ask for. Due to our overly acute sensory perceptions, we are highly creative and resourceful, so much so that at the same time, we may take our own time to complete tasks. The way I work may not agree with your ideals, but please do understand that as a HSP, I look at things in a totally different light to you. Please do feel free to ask me if I need my space or if I need any help. There are times where I would love to work on my own and at times I may appreciate your advice. 

We HSPs are extremely tolerant, empathetic and sympathetic. Please do not take me for granted or use me and then throw me on the wayside like roadkill. You may have realized that you had never heard me raise my voice, that is because I find it extremely hurtful to do so. It hurts me, just as it hurts the Bee when it uses his/her stinger, most times killing him/her. You may have seen me getting agitated and depressed after seeing a dog lying dead in the street, you may even pity my sensitivity. However, do remember that I as a HSP regard the Dog as my very own and it pains me so much to see him/her dying on the street in that rather dishonorable manner. I am there for you through thick and thin, I have left my priorities behind to offer you a shoulder to cry on. I have gone whole nights without a single minute of rest to be with you when you were stuck in a rut. This is the beauty of having a HSP as a friend. 

Please note that the above are just the preamble of hopefully a lifelong relationship built on those beautiful pillars of love, friendship, loyalty, devotion and care. Please do understand that I shared all this with you because I value our friendship and I want it to work. Friendships are extremely important for us HSPs. 

As I was growing, I learned that there was, in fact, nothing at all wrong with me. I am blessed and privileged to be who I am, because I am in a position to be a beacon of light to a world consumed in darkness and misery. However, the journey I had to make, through potholes and thorns, climbing over barbed wires and scraping my knees on that uneven terrain was, in the end worth it, because I have come to appreciate myself for who I am. I love myself! That is the first step to self recovery. 

I am glad, nay, overjoyed that there are so many HSP groups and communities popping up in a way that was never the case a few years ago! There are more and more like-minded HSPs coming together for the betterment of our trait, for love and support, for further awareness and most importantly, for acceptance! This is a pressing issue for many fledgling HSPs, especially HSP children who are growing up in environments not conducive for their personal development. I hope to further the cause of all HSPs, especially HSP children, therein lies the future of HSPs.

Writing this was a huge gamble for me, because I was not aware of how you would let this sink in, I still am not. Remember that narrating this was not an easy task for me as a HSP, I did feel vulnerable and exposed, but I also understand and appreciate the fact that this is necessary for our friendship to work. Therefore, I hope you take this in the right vein and appreciate my openness. I hope to hear your thoughts on what I have written and I shall end by saying that I hope our friendship will stand the test of time. I will always be there by your side and I hope you make me feel that I am loved and cared for, even in the event that you disagree with everything that I have said.

With all my love, peace, light and blessings,

Your Sensitive Mate

Note - The above is a partially fictional narrative, taken from my own prior experiences as a HSP. My darling brothers and sisters, I thank you from the deepest chasms of my heart for reading this rather long article, of course this is just a pithy account of what a HSP is, there's definitely a lot more than meets the eye! Please do feel free to contact me for any clarifications and please do add your thoughts in the comments section as well!

I love you all so much and God bless you always!

A Wee HSP Child's Daily Grind

Ever since I can recall, I have been sensitive, I cannot remember being anything but sensitive. I'm sensitive to smell, touch, noise, lights, physical action and so forth. Growing up as a wee HSP child was truly a challenge. It was exacerbated by the fact that I was unaware of my gift as a HSP, I was made to think that something was drastically wrong with me, that I was abnormal, different and not made to survive in a world dictated by the expression "survival of the fittest". Tonight I would like to concentrate on the HSP child's dilemmas through the eyes of a bespectacled lad - 

A HSP child feels everything that's going on around him/her. He/she feels pain, anxiety, sorrow, depression for more deeply than a non-HSP. This is also true for those feelings on the other end of the spectrum - Happiness, joy, bliss. A HSP child is still a child, albeit with such advanced sensory perceptions, thereby it does become extremely arduous for the wee lad/lass to put up with such emotions. Parents should be well aware of their kids' character so as to not cause unnecessary suffering for a HSP child. 

A HSP child needs a lot of encouragement, primarily because HSP children don't often believe in their own abilities and talents. They often tend to think that their talents aren't worth a dime. We do live in a society which is slowly but surely embracing the "Caveman ideology", whence the stronger you are, the better prospects there are of ensuring your survival. Thereby, it is imperative that a HSP child's parents guide him/her with love and encouragement, not through condemnation. 

A HSP child can be introverted or extroverted. I was the former. As an introverted HSP child (I still am, an interoverted adult now, by the way), I did face a lot of quandaries in coming to terms with attending parties and functions. An introverted HSP child would rather be to him/herself in the corner with a book rather than play with other children. Introverted HSP kids would rather speak only when needed than engage in superfluous banter. Parents with introverted HSP kids should understand that by attempting to "change" them, they are essentially destroying the very being of such kids. 

A HSP child requires a lot of protection, especially from bullies at school. A HSP child will never raise his/her fist for any reason, preferring to diffuse the situation through peace and harmony or backing into a corner. It would be advisable to home-school HSP kids because they do tend to become extremely depressed in large classrooms and especially on the playground. Most parents would essentially love to "reduce" the level of sensitivity found in their HSP kids, but this would be as futile as trying to train a fish to breathe out of water and quite dangerous as well! 

HSP children are prone to sudden downward spirals of emotions and sudden spikes as well, all within a few hours to a day or longer. HSP children do tend to find it hard discerning between emotions, whether they are affected by what they have seen on the telly or due to an issue resonating from within or if they are drawing the emotions of others around them. HSP children often suffer the most when their parents are not on talking terms with each other, therefore it is important that parents cultivate a healthy relationship with each other. 

The above are a few pointers drawn through my own experiences as a HSP child. Being HSP is a source of pride and joy for me, something I would never want to change and I hope someday that any kids I would have, will be HSP as well. 

Do understand that there are few to no differences between a HSP child and a HSP adult, except for the fact that the latter are far more well read and experienced in dealing with trials and challenges than the former. However, having said that, they still remain HSP and they still need to retreat into their sacred and personal cocoon every night. 

Dear Parents, do be glad if you happen to have a HSP child! A HSP child is intuitive, caring, empathetic, loving, loyal and above all, extremely devoted to you, come what may. If you do have a HSP child or think you do, I would strongly suggest you read Elaine Aron's "The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them", in order to learn more about the beauty, privilege and honour of having a wee HSP lad/lass.

My darling brothers and sisters, I shall conclude for today. Tomorrow, I hope to write on the challenges faced by HSP adults, though very succinctly, due to personal time constraints. 

I love you all so much! God bless you!

A Highly Sensitive Approach to Calm My Jangled Nerves...

Well, today dawned with a lot of hope and conviction - a brand new week in a job I just started towards the latter part of the preceding week. I woke up to the melodious twittering and chirping of birds, a gentle breeze and a sky splashed with hues of pink, blue, magenta and everything else in between. However, being a HSP, I do tend to get extremely nervous in the mornings, aye, mornings aren't my regular cup of tea, I usually like to sleep right through, but that is not an option. There was one bright light at the end of the tunnel though - I managed to acquire the services of a shuttle to and from work! Blimey, that sure does beat the chaotic journey via public transport! Thank heavens for that!

We HSPs are endowed with an intricate web of idiosyncratic mannerisms to help neutralize our more than desirable tendency to fall down hard. Some of us love to listen to soft music, get engrossed in a book, take a gentle stroll in the park, compose poetry, write journals, visit a cemetery and so forth, well the list is endless. However, did you notice a certain similarity in the examples I've given? Aye, calmness and gentleness play a huge role in the life of a HSP. As I was on my way to work, I witnessed a scene so atrocious and harrowing, I started shaking, literally! I saw this man pummeling a wee doggie with an iron bar! I was filled with white-hot rage! I was about to ask the driver to stop the bus, but I noticed the dog managed to get away through the maze of concrete structures. Well, that episode sure did put a damper on the rest of my day. All sorts of images reverberated through my brain; it sure does not help my cause that I constantly keep myself abreast with current affairs either. I did gulp down 5 cups of Chamomile tea, yet I was still not able to calm and compose myself. I kept finding myself thinking of what happened to that poor pooch who was treated with such enmity and hatred. What drives people to be so spiteful? I find that sometimes the answers to such questions do help to calm my nerves. 

I must say that I could not really concentrate on my work today, yet I did the best I could and the reason is that we HSPs make for some of the most conscientious employees, yet we must be allowed to work on our own terms. Since we are extremely observant and meticulous, we do well in research. We are also extremely responsible, however we are often overlooked when it comes to promotions or recognition, aren't we? I speak through experience, through trial and error. Most, if not all of my peers are settled down, some of them are married as well. Whereas, I have been drifting from job to job, no matter how hard I try to settle down, something or someone comes along to pick me up like I'm a piece of trash and throw me on the wayside like some roadkill. There were times when I looked back and wondered what I have accomplished and what my future holds, but this is where the HSP sense of spirituality comes in. I have found great repose in religion, I tend to my wee garden and speak to my bonnie flowers. I feel so much at peace when I do that. 

I did say that I will be talking more about the attributes and characteristics of HSPs, my dear brothers and sisters. Thereby, I apologize for not doing so. I have been concentrating on that rather unfortunate event which still continues to haunt me even now as I write. I shall conclude this post for today my darlings. I am weary and exhausted, it sure was a long, arduous day. 

Please do not forget to leave your thoughts and ideas in the comments as to why people can grow so spiteful and harvest such hatred. 

I love you all immensely! God bless you!

Why start a Blog primarily for the advancement of the cause for HSPs?

My adorable HSP and non-HSP brothers and sisters, today, on this the 05th of January in the year of our Lord 2014, I made a resolution, spurred by the advice and guidance of many of you, to initiate a blog of sorts for HSPs. 

Well, I'm Adrian and I'm as sensitive as they come :) What is it like to be a HSP (Highly Sensitive Person) in a world designed and hard-coded to suit the whims and fancies of a race imbued and driven by worldly success and a general notion of "the survival of the fittest" syndrome? To be frank, it is quite irksome and rather frustrating for a HSP to live in such a world, yet the paradox is that we, who according to many sources make up 15% to 20% of the population (which is by the way a high proportion for it to be characterized as a "disorder", which many erroneously think it is), do play a major role or have to, in the general order of things. 

I sure do hope you will take it easy on me, since this is my 01st post :) My previous post was in fact a research thesis I did a few years ago and I hope you were able to attain an idea on the life of a HSP. My dear brothers and sisters, we as a species are sensitive to some degree, there are no human beings who are void of sensitivity, regardless of the circumstances and trials one has gone through or is going through. However, there are those of us who take this sensitivity to a higher level. To give you an idea, I have compiled a basic list of attributes and characteristics that define us HSPs. Here they are - 

• We sense quite deeply and intricately. Smells, colours, tastes, textures, sounds and so forth are felt quite clearly. If I were to take colour as an example or guide, we tend to notice subtle changes in hues from each palette of colour. We are quite observant, to the degree that we try to shun crowded places and situations that require a great deal of physical activity and social interaction. We almost always avoid glaring lights, concerts with blaring music, pungent odours, chaos and clutter. Again, all these are mere guidelines and even within the HSP family there are those who are affected by this less so than others. It's all a matter of degree. 
• We are emotionally sensitive beings. We have quite a low threshold to pain, trials, difficulties and discomfort, which on the flip side can also mean that we are highly concerned about our health and well-being. Our acute awareness of our inner emotional being aids us in being pretty good writers, artists and other professions that require a higher level of creativity. 
• We are beings imbued with a great sense of empathy. Thereby, we make amazing social workers, nurses, doctors, aid workers, teachers and so forth, due to our enormous concern for the welfare of our brothers and sisters.

The above are a gist of who we truly are and not a comprehensive or exhaustive list, but for you to get an idea of sorts. 

I shall be speaking more of the characteristics and attributes of HSPs during the course of the week and as and when time permits me to do so. In conclusion to this post, I would like to say that I am glad, nay, blessed to be HSP and I wouldn't want to be anything else. True, being HSP brings about quite a truckload of difficulties and challenges, but the enormous amount of blessings far outweigh the challenges. 

With all my peace, love, light and blessings,

Adrian